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28 December 2020 @ 05:18 am
After thinking about it for quite some time, and after going through a few financial setbacks in setting my darkroom, i would just like to nudge =) those who read this LJ, if you like my pictures, and would like to donate anything, feel free to.

Those who do will be sent a print of any pictures in my gallery, according to the amount donated. USD1-15 will receive a 4R, USD16-30 will receive 5R, and everything above USD30 will get an 8R. Other sizes are also available, and depending on availability of paper, ranges from 8R to 20"x24". All will be signed by me, plus numbered. All 8R and above sized picture will be printed 50 times only, and the numbers will reflect the order of which they are sold. In case the print is out of circulation, i will email you for a second choice. Each print is selenium toned to stabilise the silver, and all will be printed on Ilford paper, RC, unless specified.

cheers! =)

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Wow. That's the only word I can sum up after looking at my own ambrotype print i made using chemicals acquired from extraneous means. Except for the Silver Nitrate which i bought in London when i was there for a holiday, I didn't buy any of the chemicals from any of the overseas shop. They were all bought one by one locally and mixed here as well.

All this started some 3 years ago, when this Italian dude called Fulvio came by to start a class on Alternative Photography, and back then, I've already had some ideas of doing this, but I had no means nor training to make it possible. Well, we both partnered to do what we do best; me as the marketing and resource guy, he's the trainer. To cut a long story short - it wasn't a very profitable venture, this class thing, but it did make me want to do more. So i went out of my way to find ways to do this myself. Oh we bought some chems at this stage already, but nothing came out of it, because its so hard to get things or at least, find out where to get the right things here. We kept stumbling and stumbling because we had to troubleshoot any problems that came up, and that slows things down unnecessarily.

Now, after all that time, after buying books, going for courses, travelling the length of London's rail to see their foremost expert on wet plate, I did it. it took us 3 years, 4 months and a couple of days, but I managed to make a collodion wet plate. 

And then the wetplate back died on me.

So now the whole camera is at Suwen's, Malaysia's foremost expert at camera servicing and repairs, while I'm waiting and waiting and waiting for it to come back. I will probably need to change the camera soon, or maybe just spend like something around 400 dollars for an 8x10 back that can do wetplate and then use that instead. I've waited 4 years. What's a few weeks?


Current Location: Malaysia
Current Mood: artisticartistic
19 April 2012 @ 08:02 pm
...and we are so small compared to it. 

One of the reasons i got married wasn't that i found someone i can live with. It's somewhat of a cliché, but i got married because at that moment in time, i realized she brought out all the best in me and got me wanting to be more. I just can't live without her, so to speak. 

I've also realised that to go through the cosmos on "spaceship earth" is not something i would want to do alone. God knows how scary it is out there, and going out in the world with your own tribe is probably the best thing to do.

And i learnt this, from all places, by doing photography...

How so?

Well, photography for me, is a solitary effort. Here's an example. You can go out with as many people as you like, for any sort of photographic meetup, and all of you can carry multiple cameras, some might be the same model, other might have an analog film or two. And then an event happens in front of everyone. Then everyone takes a gander at making a photo. But realise, that the very moment you shot the event, you yourself chose the aperture, the fstop, the iso, to make the picture. Even if you chose auto mode, it will still look different then the guy next to, beside or above you. Even if it IS the same setting, the angle would be different. Unlimited possibilities.. No two pictures are alike.

Which brings me back to my first point. You go at it alone. Whatever you get out of it, you get from your own sense of self worth. Nobody can say its wrong to shoot it like this or that or its better to shoot with an iphone or large format or this brand or that brand. As long as you know what you're doing, you'll be fine.

But, sometimes, its just reassuring to know that you're on the right path, that some else see's what you're doing and tells you "hey honey, you're doing alright" That you dont have to go drinking in a roomful of strangers, or go back to an empty house. You just want to have someone behind you who says "its okay. You did good"

I'm glad i have that.

05 March 2012 @ 04:45 pm
...so, its 2012 already, and I'm married, turned pro photographer, writing presentations and a lot of in-between jobs. Oh, and I've also shot kings and queens, supermodels, state leaders, millionaires and entrepreneurs and normal people too. Why do i say this you say? Well, if I can have it any other way, i wont change what happened to me for the world.

And what happened to me was a long and convoluted story. Suffice to say, I was told to leave, without compensation, and I did. But I  was also firm in the belief that karma is a bitch, and that whatever bad stuff that transpired between me and the old company, it was for the better for my own personal development. 

So here I am, putting thoughts to (electronic) paper, just so I can straighten my thoughts out. 

Oh well, expect more stuff here about the making off and BTS stuff. =)

13 April 2011 @ 12:55 pm
As i write this, i'm prepping for a shoot this weekend. I still haven't finalised the shoot time, and also i'm supposed to shoot 2 more talents in the evening. I'm also producing some cd's for an upcoming singer, and she just gave her input to our references. which isn't what we wanted.

Add to the fact i have something big happening later in my life, it's just getting to be very, very hectic.

you know how CEO's and übermensch and women seems to do more? I think its all a fallacy. they just do bigger things, and not do the small stuff. pay bills, que for food, call people? who cares, they don't do that, they get their PAs to do it.

which goes back to me giving excuses why i don't have time.

actually i probably do, i'm just too lazy or sidetracked or i get overwhelmed.

and for that, if you don't receive a reply from people like me, if you didn't hear from me after sending a question. even if you think you should've heard from me but you didn't, just be kind and give me another nudge? i might just be compelled to get off my ass to reply to you, among other things i should've done today...

30 January 2011 @ 04:25 pm

As I type this, its monsoon season in Malaysia. It wet outside, and the sky reflects it too. All dark and dreary. It's always been a consternation of mine last time, when bad weather occur, to just think there is no photographic opportunities to be found in that weather. Well, unless im willing to go out and be wet and make my equipment wet too! Speaking of which, I'm no NatGeo-type photographer who risks tooth-and-nail for that one image. I'm just a desk jockey who happens to carry a camera around who had a somewhat successful images that's commercially viable (Trans: I sold some pictures).

well, as i get older, and I dont feel like walking for too long and too far to find photographic opportunities anymore (unless i make them! but thats another story!) i just carry my camera around, weather be damned! and somehow, this approach has surprised me for far more than not. there is always drama all around you if you just open your eyes and know where to look (or expect for things to happen).

for instance:

this was taken on a very rainy afternoon at a Ramadhan Bazaar in PJ. the man was trying to drain the excess water from his tent and this is what happened when it goes out all at once.

i only trained the camera on him for a few seconds before it happened in a splt second. i didnt know if its going to happen or not, just that i expected something to happen. the fact that it happened as soon as got the picture composed was a bonus.

the fact is, this kind of luck isn't luck at all, but a skill that can be trained. most PJs have it. you can also train yourself for it. but you just need to venture outside and carry your camera with you. Of course, be smart about it. Make sure all your electronics are sealed against water. If you're at sea, just wrap them up in a shower cap with just the lens area open. Most modern dslr cameras nowadays are reasonably sealed against tame weather conditions (I'm talking droplets of water and low temperature conditions, not harsh ones like near arctic or typhoon weather.) and so wont be really harmed if you take them out and shoot them in the rain once in a while.

Ill just share one more picture with you:

This was taken during Puerto Rican Day in Coney Island. The weather was shite, and it was cold and gloomy. All of a sudden, this guy came up to me, danced, held a pose, and I shot him. Now, if I did not have my camera with me, I doubt he would've came to me even. Its just one of those things that makes you stop and think for a moment before you go hmm.

So all I'm saying is, dont let bad weather be a deterrent to yourself. There's always something interesting somewhere in front of you, you just need to open your eyes to the possibility...

07 January 2011 @ 01:50 am
I am reading my old wishlist entry here and realised I did so much in so little time! Actually, ever since I gained the consciousness of an old man, my only resolution every year is just two words.


Whch is pretty amusing when i read that old wishlist of mine...

...for my photographic fine art endeavour.

- lithium grease (for oiling the gears of the camera)
This was easy to get. And i got it as soon as i wished for it i think, from my boss at the office whos an avid cyclist.

- camera oil (ditto)
I made this from linseed oil and a smidgeon of lithium, i think. OK, maybe not linseed oil, but i have the exact recipe in my notes somewhere. =)

- green screen (at the moment 9'x20' would suffice...for infinite background)
I didnt get a green screen...

- Hasselblad 120mm makro planar f4 lens (for that portrait shoot)
...nor did i get this lens...

- RH F-stop timer (my life in the darkroom would be infinitely more convenient with this around)
...but I did get this...

- 20"x24" print processor and washer (so i dont have to worry about space when i develop my prints)
...while this is pretty expensive to ship, im tempted to make my own...

- 4"x5" film tank (to develop my negatives)
I got this...

- a camera lens wrench (to tighten the lens on my large format)
...but not this...

- geared tripod head from Manfrotto model #405 (i really hate ball heads, it gets wobbly, not precise for me...)
nor these...

- one set of Pocket wizard.
I did get these... I use them everytime. third most used item in my setup...First two is body and 17-40L

- a complete lighting setup from profoto/ elinchrom
...and I did get a 3 light setup from Visatec, and one light from Elinchrom...

- a few boxes of paper from ilford sizes 20"x24" to 16"x20", fiber and RC (why ilford? because its easily bought, not as rare as other papers)
...and also these!!!

this does seem like a big list, because the cost itself seeems huge! i keep telling myself, its the journey, not the destination - everyone gets to where they want to go, but its the journey that makes you...but hey, if anybody wants to donate to a good cause, you know where to find me. =P"

Ah...wishlist... i like how they make you feel old and crap... =P
05 October 2010 @ 04:13 pm
Well, today I worked out after a long time of not working out. worked up quite a sweat too. Stopped exercising
after I did a GOMAD (gallon of milk a day) to bulk up... And learnt a lesson in lactose intolerance.  

Anyways, it took me a while to recover- but that trip to NYC was really a great help in recovery. It really did
make me feel much better there than I was in Malaysia. Stress at work, most likely. Lost my GERD as well when I
came back. Hopefully it doesn't come up...

Anyways, I follow stronglifts.com regime. I got a miny gym at home so am gonna do this twice a week, til I get
some stamina back. Then I can do thrice a week.

But oh, my muscles are sooo gonna be sore tomorrow...
27 September 2010 @ 05:04 pm

Assistants  :: Syariff Akhtar Azizi, Nas

Location :: Clubhouse, BU, Malaysia.
21 September 2010 @ 02:00 pm
I'm going thru a tight spot at the moment- I'm hard-up on time. And that deficit is making me lose it big time, because I have no time to finish post-production of my photos the way I want it. I would love to be uncompromising and do it my way, but sometimes, you can't. 70% of the Clients just want something, Anything. They do not care if the pics are good or bad (as evidenced by all the Photoshop OOPS moment from many websites dedicated to these phenomenon)

I'm sorry if I do sound snappish- not enough rest from a few days shoot. I HOPE you all understand.

Ok gonna crash now. Can barely open eyes. Cheers!